oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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