I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
