Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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