so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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