yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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