yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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