Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Four minutes until I can fart!
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
