After last night, I could never be a politician.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
