I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
