So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
