Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize