this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
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Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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