So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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