elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
