Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
