..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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