three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
