she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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