so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
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