My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
