Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
