There is no way he is gay with that hair.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize