The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
