Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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