some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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