you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
