I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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