just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
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