Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
