how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
nutella sex= disaster
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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