summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
