I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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