Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
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