Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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