I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".