Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.

Fav 30 4511 1326
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(509): View more from Washington

im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.

Fav 16 4096 1149
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(951): View more from California

she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.

Fav 18 4355 1511
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27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
Read it at the TFLN blog
(304): View more from West Virginia

I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.

Fav 8 2545 1472
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(443): View more from Maryland

I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.

Fav 7 1086 819
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(316): View more from Kansas

It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.

Fav 14 1971 921
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(954): View more from Florida

Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order

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(678): View more from Georgia

Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".

Fav 4 55 13
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