I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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