Are you dead
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
what ever happened to devon sawa?
i'm really worried about him.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan