he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
