no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
How's work?
Spinning.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
