sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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