I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
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I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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