HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
