Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
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