Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
