That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
we should paint friendship bongs
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
