maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
