AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
