The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
