whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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