I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
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his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
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You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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